POEMS TO DIALYSE BY

This blog post was made by Ant de Villiers on July 26th, 2018.
POEMS TO DIALYSE BY

NOCTURNAL TRAINING

I don’t want to sound ungrateful

But in-clinic training was hateful.

Confined to a chair

Is grossly unfair

Relaxed in a bed would be helpful.

DRY WAIT

Such is my fate

Wife once again late!

3 hours since drinking

What is she thinking?

This is a dry wait.

ONLINE LIFELINE

Fellow warriors – do not fall!

Searing trials unite us all.

Online you’ll find

Folk of the mind

Connect and make the call!

Editor’s note: Join our closed Facebook discussion group!

IN PRAISE OF HHD

Circulating through a machine

My blood is returned quite clean.

Life’s prospect had paled

Since both kidneys failed

But now is a fair future seen!

CHEERS TO DIALYSIS

Life’s prospects paling,

Both kidneys failing,

I went for adoption

Of the dialysis option –

Ship once again sailing!

COOL IT ON THE PUMP

Pump speed 500 is like thunder

Can shred the blood cells asunder

By now we should know

To keep it real slow

Let’s help all not make the blunder.

COMPLEX TERMS

If there’s one thing that causes hilarity

And at times amongst us polarity.

It’s the use of our terms!

What happed to “germs?”

Not sophisticated enough, - try “modality.”

LADDER CANNULATION

Laddering probes here and there

The whole fistula gets a fair share.

The access’s strength

Is its visible length –

Needling’s quite easy to bear.

CANNULATION

Cannulation’s an act of precision

Where will you make your incision?

Buttonholing’s quite tame –

The location’s the same

Laddering requires strict decision

AV FISTULA

Feeling ill- in a mess I confess,

Surgery delivered success!

With almost no pain

A joined artery and vein

Afforded dialysis access.

FRESENIUS 4008B

For a machine that lengthens my days

I have nothing but heartfelt praise.

Now rarely bored

My health well restored

I pursue my old pastimes and ways.

THE HARASSED CARE-GIVER

How I wish I could find her,

She needs a constant reminder!

It’s no good being late

Controlling phosphate

C’mon and bring me my binder!

CAUTIOUS CONFIDENT CANNULATION

Provided you’re centered and calm

A needle stuck in your arm –

With swab in the ready

And hand nice and steady

Is unlikely to do any harm.

FUTILE DREAMS

I slept in a gorgeous old barn

Far away on a deep country farm.

Then a large noisy duck

Brought a close to my luck

You guessed it – the Fresenius alarm!

NO PEEPING

There is certainly no escaping

The need for patience when taping.

Also do avoid peeking

To see if blood’s seeping –

The time is always worth taking.

HOME VISIT

Some say there’s nothing much worse,

Than the visit by the bossy young nurse!

But she’s not really mean

Just obsessed with hygiene –

Would you rather send for a hearse?

BUTTONHOLING

Many claim piercing the same site

Makes the buttonhole method just right.

After careful inspection

And sound disinfection

The needling task is quite light.

ONLINE HELP

By making time online

Dialysis warriors shine.

Getting sound advice

And being consistently nice

Time after time after time.

Comments

  • Pui Pui Cheok

    Aug 13, 2018 8:20 AM

    Nice Poems, I read them a few times:) I wish I could have more poems from you..Thank you.

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  • John agar

    Jul 26, 2018 8:26 PM

    There’s a man from New Zealand called Ant
    An experienced dialysis savant
    His wit brings us smiles
    While his pumps and his dials
    Keep him well till he gets his transplant

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    • Dori

      Jul 30, 2018 3:31 PM

      You missed your calling as a poet, John! :-)

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  • Leong Seng Chen

    Jul 26, 2018 4:16 PM

    Good morning everyone, far or near, known or unknown in today globalization village! The hill is alive with the beautiful sound of natural music... Thank You for making my life-journey meaningful & wonderful once again... May all sentient beings well healthy happy with peace of living lives for the rest of their respective journey on this tiny grain of sand so called earth. Let us move on & live in harmony with warm heart-mind with each other. Together we surely can make it a better world! CHEERS~~~

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    • Dori

      Jul 30, 2018 3:32 PM

      Thank YOU for being a positive voice in the world of dialysis and inspiring your fellow warriors!

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  • Miriam Lippel Blum

    Jul 26, 2018 4:02 PM

    In limericks both clever and terse,
    Ant de Villiers expresses in verse,
    His warrior fights
    With poetic insights
    Dialysis, for better or worse!

    Thanks for the great blog post.

    Best wishes,
    Miriam

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    • Dori

      Jul 30, 2018 3:32 PM

      OMG, I love this! <3

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  • Gale Schulke

    Jul 26, 2018 2:13 PM

    I am printing these off for my patients. Thankyou

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  • Henning

    Jul 26, 2018 2:09 PM

    Thank you, Ant

    You really made my day. Now I can go to bed smiling

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